The Top 7 Myths About Therapy in San Francisco (or anywhere, really)
The Top 7 Myths About Therapy in San Francisco (or anywhere, really)
Let’s debunk some myths and tell the truth about therapy, shall we?
Myth #1: Therapy is only for ‘crazy’ people or someone who is really mentally ill and that’s not me.
Truth: You might be surprised to know that although people who have a serious mental illness such as schizophrenia or bipolar disorder do benefit from therapy, many (many) others do as well. There’s an extensive spectrum of difficulties including plenty of ordinary, every day problems that everyone faces at one time or another. The reasons people seek therapy are diverse, such as wanting to have closer relationships with friends, exploring creativity and self-care, addressing life events such as a divorce, adjusting to a recent move, or a job loss. Or struggles around anxiety in social situations, or feeling like an impostor at work. People also utilize therapy as a weekly wellness check-in or a place for exploring personal growth. All reasons for seeking therapy are valid.
Myth #2: A therapist will fix all my problems for me, or tell me what to do.
Truth: Although many of us would love to have a magic wand, it just doesn’t exist. And even if it did and your external problems could magically be waved away, you wouldn’t change as a person – the problematic thoughts and limiting beliefs you’ve had would still be there and what’s driving those problems would still remain as well. I view myself as a collaborator to assist you on your path. A GPS course corrector to help identify the usual roadblocks and to figure out a way to dismantle them so you can navigate your life more smoothly. If you’re seeking an anxiety therapist in San Francisco, I can partner with you to address your unique needs.
Myth #3: Going to therapy means that there’s something wrong with me.
Truth: Experiencing painful shit in your life, feeling stuck, and unable to move forward in the way you want is really a universal condition. There are no perfect people who never have problems, who never make mistakes, who never regret actions, who never suffer over others’ actions. And you, as much as anyone else, deserve to have some help to figure things out and to have a life with more satisfaction and joy. Many well-known artists, writers, actors, and musicians such as Emma Stone, Ryan Reynolds, Adele, Lizzo, and Kerry Washington, have credited therapy with helping them to manage their anxiety, depression, loss, and self-doubt. Whether you’re struggling with anxiety or other kinds of challenges, therapy can help. And you don’t have to be famous for it to be okay to reach out.
Myth #4: A therapist is just going to sit there silently while I talk for an hour.
Truth: While there may be people who mostly need and want to be able to share their inner thoughts and feelings without much comment, probably the average person doesn’t. Many therapists, including myself, are much more active and directive. I help clients to clearly identify the problem or problems that brought them to therapy, and I inquire about what got them stuck or keeps them there. Then I can offer new skills, tools, and strategies specific to them to help them move through their problems in a different way.
Myth #5: I can’t tell my hard stuff to a total stranger, so there’s no point.
Truth: This is one of the myths that is powerful and can really hold you back from getting help. Whereas there are people who might be able to share personal facts and details about their life to a therapist pretty quickly simply because of the role that person has - you’re a therapist and I’m supposed to tell you these things so that’s what I’m going to do – many people find the idea daunting. Why wouldn’t you? The fact is that all relationships take time to build. If you think about strong friendships you’ve had, generally trust wasn’t automatic. The main difference between those relationships and therapy is that we’re trained to listen closely, to focus entirely on you, and to look for the ways we can help with your issues. The other main difference is that as a therapist I’m going to check in with you to make sure the pacing is right for you. This is your journey and you’re driving the car.
Myth #6: I’ve already thought about all of this, there’s nothing a therapist can tell me.
Truth: We none of us have perfect awareness, knowledge, or insight, and we of course see things from our own perspective. Even writers who create characters who have different perspectives are still creating from their own vantage points. We are necessarily hampered by our blind spots. And just as writers benefit from having a new pair of eyes on their pages, clients can greatly benefit from seeing a therapist who has been educated and trained to address a variety of problems that humans encounter in the business of living. I encourage you to consider that therapists will have perspectives you might not have thought of and can offer you different tools and strategies that perhaps are new to you.
Myth #7: I’ve been in therapy before and it didn’t help, so this isn’t going to be any different.
Truth: Therapists aren’t all cut from the same cloth. There are many different types of therapy and types of approaches to suit a variety of issues and problems. Sometimes it’s a matter of chemistry, sometimes it’s that your needs are best addressed by a different approach. I know it’s hard, but I encourage people to have an initial conversation with a few therapists and note how you feel during and afterwards. Don’t give up. You deserve to feel better than you do now.
Last thoughts from an anxiety therapist in San Francisco:
You deserve support from someone who can truly help you. Therapy is an important relationship to get real support and achieve goals that have real meaning for you. I hope this helps you explode some of the myths that might have held you back from seeking a therapist in San Francisco who can help you reach your goals. You deserve to get healing and feel better. If you’d like to know if I might be able to help you feel less anxious and more confident in yourself and your creative work, give me a call at 415 379-3615 for a free 20-minute consultation.